A Family Affair

http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/01/15/obama.family/index.html?iref=mpstoryview

It's not that I'm hatin on Oprah but, all the success in the world can't measure up to the powerful image of the Obama Family. In all actuality, I cringe at the widening gender gap in America today. True, physical bondage has ended for those outside the prison walls. True, de-segregation has allowed us to shop at Wal Mart, filling our carts with cheap cosmetics and bulk chicken thighs. True Harvard admits and graduates, brown-skinned people like Gwendolyn Gordon, my cousin and now Lawyer, and Barack H. Obama. The new day has been here all along, just beneath the infectious veneer of mass media.

Another way, many of the real students from A Different World (HBCUs) and other colleges graduated and grew up to be fine citizens. Many started families. According to the above article in CNN, in 2005, 69% of black mothers gave birth out of wedlock. Compared to the 31% of white mothers. This is a startling statistic, devastating the concept and institution of the Black Family.

Why is this? I travel back in time to my freshman year at Hampton University for clues... "Man, its like 16:1 !" The rumored female to male student ratio created a daunting spectrum of estrogen. My freshman year was like watching a tennis match between the Williams sisters. I made the Deans list, much to the chagrin of cliche. We were told during a freshman week orientation session to, "look to our left and right," and that, "one of you will not be here at graduation." A sobering reminder of matriculation realities. I watched both guys and girls leave; after first semester, then the second,... the ratio becoming more lopsided.

I extrapolated similar phenomenon at other HBCUs across the country and knew the "viable" population of Black male partners I was a member of was a shrinking one. As a result, I probed the minds of sistas for their interests and standards concerning males. I experimented with dating and even lost my virginity... I "had" to know what Black Women were about...if the rumors were true about "size mattering" and what they dreamed and griped about. I wanted to marry and start my family with a Black woman, so five years of experimentation, a B.S. degree, and I was feelin like I'd have a shot at being happy, despite my lack of attention and any long-term relationships before or during college.

I consider it an edge. I know a lil about shoes, well at least what sik Choo's are...
I scour magazines and blogs for the dopest lounges, djs, and restaurants. I even keep a running tab of seasonal cocktails, just in case I meet a lush turned plush (but I don't drink much). More importantly, I know "Miss Independent" has her own and is looking for some one to match her. What more could a woman ask for than another comparable (or greater) income? She is also more than likely Christin, so I keep up with my Scripture despite not claiming any particular building. I also know how to flirt, cook, two-step, and kiss.

My goal? Victory. Jay-Z equates it with "a kid" who will carry his "legacy and make history." Family. One way to live beyond the flesh. Family, a true curator of happiness. Family, the motivator of mini-vans and picket fences...

Sly and the Who Stone?
You already know!

-delano